Our Race to Retirement: First Month

Financial Fluency: My first Month

BLOGGER: DEBORAH HEISER

Click this link to read the first article: Our Race to Retirement

Click this link to read the second article:  Our Race to Retirement: The Preparation Begins

A bit more than a month has passed since Jackie, Judy and I purchased our first stocks.  Here’s how it happened.  We took a financial fluency course and were inspired to compete (using 1,000) to see who could do the best at picking stocks.

Jackie, Judy and I each set up accounts for 1,000.  Here’s how we’ve done so far…

Debbie:

To start, I decided to use an old retirement account that had been doing poorly for many years (and I mean poorly – when I got it way more than 10 years ago, it had 5,000 in it.  Since that time, it has dipped to less than 1,000).  I wondered if I’d end up owing money on it and figured I couldn’t possibly do worse than the professionals who had managed it.

• I activated the account online and added some money to bring it up to 1000.
• Next, I started reading the Wall Street Journal and my usual news sources each morning.

Then I looked around at what I like personally, and what I use personally on a regular basis. I continued to read the papers and online news: NY Times, CNN, WSJ,  and I added something new.  I looked at what I tend to purchase, what I like, and what I notice others doing and buying.  Since I don’t’ eat out all that often, I didn’t feel comfortable buying fast food or restaurant/coffee shop stocks.  I also don’t have major brand loyalty when it comes to major stores for shopping.  I’ll go anywhere for the basics.  So, that left me with my annual gift that I get from my husband.  A handbag.  If there is a major holiday or birthday, I’m sure to get a handbag.  And, it is from Coach.  Although this didn’t start based on brand loyalty (he couldn’t find the store he was originally looking for and stopped in at a Coach store and bought the bag in the window).  I liked the bag, so rather than try something new, this bag purchase has become a tradition.  I looked around and noticed a lot of other women toting Coach bags and accessories: on the subway, in the grocery store, on the street, and in airports.  They are everywhere!  So, I made my first purchase of nearly 500.00 (I found out you don’t get much for 500.00) and left the rest of the money in the account to see how I did with my first pick.

• Then I watched as it did GREAT – it climbed, climbed and climbed.  I was feeling pretty good, so I threw caution to the wind, and went against my original idea of waiting 6 months to see who I did on my first stock and bought my second stock.  Hewlett Packard.

This was because I’ve always had HP printers, and everyone I know for the most part has HP printers.  I realized this isn’t a good reason to pick a stock, but it worked for Coach, so why not.  Anyway, it did well for a day or two and I felt like a stock picking winner.  Then…the decline.  Day after day, decline in both stocks.  In fact, I kept reading the news and came to find out even Coach CEO and EVPs sold massive amounts of their personal stocks in the company.  So, I am not considering myself a stock picking maven.

I did notice, though, the market has bounced back up and my stocks are about even with where they were when I purchased them.  I’m going to just sit back and wait to see how they do.  I’m not planning to impulsively sell them or do anything for now.

• So, end result, I’m down right now, from my original 1000.00, but not far down.  I’m doing better than the account was doing before I started, but let’s see how it all works out in the long run.

Judy:

Judy has a bit more knowledge than me (she is the smart one) and she bought her stocks when they got to a price per share she was comfortable with .  In her words “I placed orders on all these stocks.  I did a little research, saw the previous days lows and highs, and picked a figure a little higher than the low.  Wouldn’t you know, the stocks kept climbing from that day on!  It took a few days/weeks to secure my stocks at my order prices.”  Judy bought Target, Diamond ETF (I have no idea what that is) and Panera (based on her 18 year-old daughter’s advice).

Target and Diamond ETF went down, but Panera went up.

Jackie:

She opened her account, bought her stock, and hasn’t checked it since, so we have no idea how she’s done.   So, by default, unless she can prove otherwise, she moves behind me in this race.

So far…Race results are :

Judy

Debbie

Jackie

But don’t count anyone out yet.  The race continues!!!!

If you’d like to join in on the “race” leave a comment.

And, we welcome advice!

To read the bio for Deborah Heiser, click here.

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Our Race to Retirement: The Preparation Begins

Our Race to Retirement: The Preparation Begins

BLOGGER:  DEBORAH HEISER

Click this link to read the first article: Our Race to Retirement

On our midlife quest to use our newly acquired basic (and I mean basic) financial knowledge about stocks, bonds, mutual funds and all sorts of other gobbly gook (I mean important information), Jackie, Judy and I have been preparing for May 1^st . The- big day when we use our new financial skills to actually start trading! We’ve decided to take $1,000.00 and see if we can make it grow (and whoever does best…wins. I’m not sure what we win but anyway…).

I’ve been keeping track of what I’ve been doing since we took the course less than two weeks ago. Here’s what I’ve done so far:

Day 1

I came home at the end of the course filled with excitement. That evening I opened my binder. Then I closed it.

Day 2

The next day I got up and took out my binder again and opened it. Then I took a break and got a cup of coffee.

I came back and reopened the binder, took a deep breath and told myself it was now or never. I turned to the first tab: Day to Day Financial Planning. That was hard work. I needed another break, so I checked my email.

Once I got a grip on myself, I opened Excel and made myself sit at my desk. This was not easy. I got out the personal budget template, followed the category headings and made one for myself in Excel. Okay, not bad. I emailed Judy and Jackie to gloat…er…let them know I’d actually accomplished my first task. I felt pretty good!

Day 3

I was on fire. I turned the page in my binder and created my Personal Budget. This, I admit was not fun. Rationalizing all my take-out meals and other unnecessary necessities took a lot out of me. Granted, there wasn’t a real RED FLAG anywhere, all the spending just looks bad when it’s in black and white on a spreadsheet. Still, overall ICK.

Day 4

Drained from looking at spreadsheets, I took a day off to slack off a bit and tried to figure out how to rationalize my spending on take-out and eating in restaurants. This was tougher than I thought. So, I took anther day off to gather strength. Note, I didn’t even start to think about how I’d begin the investment part of the project.

Day 5

I still wasn’t thinking about investing, but figured I’d start thinking about the idea of thinking about investing. So, I set out to organize (which means open the file drawer) some of our accounts so I’d actually know what was in them. Lo and behold, I found an account I’d long ago forgotten about – an old Fidelity IRA account I had from a long ago job way before I even started grad school. It was one of those accounts where I received a statement in the mail periodically. I’d usually just throw it away, and ever so occasionally, I’d open it, see the amount had decreased yet again and then throw the statement away. That was the old me.

The new me phoned the company and asked all sorts of questions using my newly acquired financial lingo. I realized that I never called about my retirement accounts prior to this because I didn’t even know enough to know what kinds of questions to ask. I felt empowered.

I decided this account would be used as my starting point. My first steps were made – I have my $1,000 in an account and now I’m ready to start figuring out what stocks to buy. Wish me (oh yeah, and Jackie and Judy) luck!!!

If you have any tips or suggestions for us, please let us know.And…

Who do you think will win this competition?

Are you for Team Jackie, Team Judy or Team Debbie?  Leave your pick in the comment box below and it will be posted!

To read the bio for Deborah Heiser, click here.

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Our Race to Retirement

Our Race to Retirement

BLOGGER: DEBORAH HEISER

I’ve always had a fear of finance. Just the word scares me. I’m okay with balancing my checkbook and doing that kind of stuff, but when I hear about 401k plans, annuity funds, IRAs, and mutual funds, it all sounds like Charlie Brown’s teacher ‘s muffled “moia moia moia moia”. So, over the years, when people brought up the topic of retirement accounts, investing, and all that stuff, my eyes would glaze over, drool would form at the corner of my mouth, and I’d start to think about anything else. Laundry. Dinner, Vanilla. Well, I figured that now that I’m in my 40’s I’d best conquer my fear of finance. Take the bull by the horns (hehe). So, when my sister-in-law Jackie told me her best friend Judy was invited to a Financial Fluency course at her alma mater, Barnard, I decided it was worth it to pay 250 dollars to learn how to save money. Jackie, Judy and I all enrolled and took the two day course. Here’s what went down…

We all arrived, ate everything possible at the breakfast, guzzled enormous amounts of coffee, took about 7 free pens from the registration desk and went to our room to learn. The course had about 15 women in it, and the instructor that started it off was great. She made it seem perfectly easy for us all to achieve financial fluency – and beyond. This, however, was told to us after we learned that if we didn’t do anything about our finances, we could all end up eating cat food by the time we are in our 80s. Eeekkk…Fear and panic was an understatement. I made a note to myself. 1. Suck up to the kids so they’ll take care of me. 2. Tell husband he is never allowed to retire.

Jackie and I cowered as we learned we might have to learn to love Fancy Feast. Judy was more worried about keeping what she has (I don’t need to spell it out – but she’s the smart one of the three of us). Note to self. 1. Suck up to Judy. 2. Tell Jackie to suck up to Judy.

At the end of the first day, we felt empowered that we’d be able to learn about stocks, bonds, mutual funds and all the stuff you need to know about in order to be able to retire like the shop-aholic, vacation-loving ladies we are. I went home to my family to begin sucking up to my 4 and 5 year-olds and to tell my husband his working days were never going to end. Jackie and Judy, on the other hand, partied the night away. We all, however, were deeply inspired and ready to learn on the second day. We asked questions, we learned words and jargon, and we left at the end of day two with a mission.

The three of us felt so empowered, that we decided to each independently invest 1,000, beginning May 1^st. We also decided to make it a competition to see who could do the best with their thousand dollars. So, we three novices are going to compete to see who can become the best investor after having a two day course on Financial Fluency. We are going to each open an account, put 1,000 in it and invest it. We’re going to track our progress each month. So follow along with us!  We’ll keep you posted with our progress.

Here’s a little background on each of us:

Jackie is a single 40-something. Never invested anything but she can shop better than anyone I know.

Judy is a newly single 40-something with two children in college. She’s the smart one. She graduated from Barnard. She hasn’t invested before but knows people who do.

Debbie is a married 40-something with two young children and a husband who is never allowed to retire. Hasn’t invested and isn’t as good at shopping as Jackie.

If you have any tips or suggestions for us, please let us know. And…

Who do you think will win this competition?

Are you for Team Jackie, Team Judy or Team Debbie?  Leave your pick in the comment box below and it will be posted!

To read the bio for Deborah Heiser, click here.

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The Best is Yet to Be: The 40s

The Best is Yet to Be: The 40s

BLOGGER: DEBORAH HEISER, PHD

Midlife begins at 40. But what does MIDLIFE really mean? Does it mean an end to youth, a beginning of a new chapter in life? Is life half over by 40, or is 40 really the new 30? The answer? It’s all true. But…that isn’t all bad. We have a lot to look forward to! For example, did you know that in their 40s, most people become more intimate? Hmmm…I’ll talk more about that in a minute…And in your 50s you are likely to become more generative? This doesn’t mean that you become more productive; it means that you become more giving of yourself, which turns out to be a good thing not just for you, but also for all of those around you. Your 60s are likely to get even better, because by this time, you are likely to experience deeper intimacy and generativity. Wow. Chances are you’ll feel more fulfilled; have stronger relationships and just feel better about life. In other words, you are moving toward the feeling of a life well lived. And isn’t that what most of us aspire to?

So, come along and find out what is in store for midlife, beginning with the 40s.

Know Thyself

· We know ourselves better than we ever have once we reach our 40s.

· We are more likely to have reached a level of “intimacy” rather than “isolation”

· We have fewer but better friends than in our 20s and 30s

Twenty years ago, most people in their 40s were in an established career, relationship or marriage, and parents of children in their teens or beyond. When someone pictured a 40 year old, it was pretty different from the nearly impossible snapshot of what life looks like for people in their 40s today. The lifestyle has changed so that today, there are lots of people in their 40s getting married for the first time, having their first child and/or starting new careers. In this way, the 40s are like the new 30s. We’ve essentially, extended our youth (and that isn’t such a bad thing). There are some in their 40s who are sending their kids off to college, enjoying more free time and maybe even pondering retirement. But there are some defining features for our 40s. For one, most people know themselves better, and thus, are more comfortable with who they are. That inner voice becomes louder and demands we pay attention! Decisions tend to be made based on who you know yourself to be rather than who we think we should be (pleasing mom, friends, significant others).

This gives the 40-somethings the ability to:

· Speak frankly and openly

· Not take things so personally

· Be less superficial

· Expect to be listened to

· Savor life

· Be more resourceful

· Appreciate what makes people different (become less judgmental)

In essence, as the great psychologist Erik Erikson wrote over a half century ago, this boils down to a stronger self-identity, making the 40-somethings more secure, independent, and able to form closer relationships with others. Being less guarded and more self-assured opens us up for better, more meaningful interactions with others. —-This is intimacy. —- So, intimacy isn’t just found between the bed sheets. It isn’t just referring to relationships with a spouse or significant other. It is the relationship we have with our children, family and friends too. In our 40s, we hope to achieve a healthy level of intimacy. The alternative to intimacy, what we are fighting to overcome, is isolation. What this really means is:

Intimacy Isolation

Retain a sense of self Not achieving a sense of reciprocity from others

Isolation likely is due to a lack of sense of self or insecurity, making it difficult to form secure relationships with others. We can see, when people go through “blips” in life, where external forces affect our lives, that our sense of self can be “rocked” which can make a strong relationship go through an unstable or less stable period. We can also see that some people who don’t know themselves, or are insecure about themselves start to find themselves, or become more in tune with their identity, and that can create difficulties in achieving or maintaining intimacy.

So to sum up the 40s, something changes as we age. Over time, we begin to become choosier about who we want to spend our spare time with. We have confidence in ourselves and don’t need friends around to simply tell us, “wow, cute hair…great handbag…cool boyfriend” like when we were in our 20s. It isn’t about the external stuff so much anymore. For the most part, we know what looks good on us, we know what we want to buy, and how we want to present ourselves. We aren’t buying new Prada shoes because a girlfriend has a pair or a new Iphone to be important (well, maybe that is stretching it).

So, tell us, have you reached the level of Intimacy in your 40s? – Simply leave a message in the comment box and it will be posted!

To read the bio for Deborah Heiser, click here.

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Facebooking at 40…

Facebooking at 40

BLOGGER: DEBORAH HEISER

So…I finally broke down and joined Facebook.  After all, it’s one of the most popular sites for people over 40.  How could I resist?  I was hesitant, I have to admit–I even poo poo-ed it.  At first I just went through the motions of joining (leaving off my picture of course – so no one would know I joined).  Then I started trolling the site.  Punching in names.  Looking at pictures.  Punching in names.  Looking at pictures.  It was a secret obsession.  The first few days, every time my husband came in the room I’d click on something else so he wouldn’t know I’d been trolling around on Facebook (FB as it’s referred to by us insiders).  I would act like I’d been busy working on something important  (like backing up my hard drive or something).  But the obsession didn’t wane.

I uploaded my picture and started responding to   “friend requests” from people I hadn’t heard from in decades.  Hit by a wave of nostalgia and curiosity, I continued on – staying up late and procrastinating on other work so I could continue with my new obsession.  It was fun to remember grade school antics with old friends, see pictures of them with their children and husbands and pets.  See the guys who lost their hair and gained a gut, the girls who stayed remarkably good looking, and to read about how the “wild girls” had tamed down and were now caring moms and wives.  It was a sense of relief to see how so many people had moved away and went on to do interesting things with their lives.  Plus, with the click of a button to request a friend, I could reconnect with people and chat online as though decades had not passed.

Now that a couple of weeks have passed, I have to say that my initial curiosity and obsession has started to wane and I’m past the point of needing to log in several times a day.   I think it is because there is still a superficial quality to the site .  And I just don’t quite “get” some of the aspects.   I can’t understand, some of the “poke”, “super poke” and flutterby (probably have that one spelled wrong), or the gifting and getting drinks for people.  I keep screwing them up.  For example, someone poked me to “go dancing” and I couldn’t find a response other than “throw a sheep” or “give a hug” or “chest bump” with the person. (It turns out there are other choices but I couldn’t figure out how to find them).  Anyway, I chose to “chest bump” the woman–I guess it is okay to be socially awkward as long as it is online.  Right?  Someone else got me a dog award ribbon.  Should I have been offended?  And, when someone gave me a “drink” I thought it was cute, but was confused about how to accept it without giving it out to 20+ other people.

Anyway, here’s the thing: I think these pokings, giftings and other things are okay, but what I really wanted was to go beyond the “super-poking” and fake gifting.  I wanted to find out what people were actually up to.  And not on a screen where everyone else could see everything I wrote.  After all, what if my co-workers were also secretly trolling FB and found out I’d had such a blast in high school going out drinking and doing all kinds of wild things I like to pretend I never did.  Or, what if they found out I chest bumped with a woman or threw a sheep at her with a super poke?  Please, how seriously would anyone take me? Now that I’m 40, I have a need for more than online sheep throwing.  If I’m going to continue staying up late, I want it to be for something more than curiosity clicking on the internet. 

As a developmental psychologist, I realized that what I was doing (well, not the secret trolling and awkward “poking”) was actually in keeping with the developmental milestones of midlife.  As we age it is normal to shed some of our superficial friendships and concentrate on more “intimate” or fulfilling relationships.  This is often because we have families and hectic work schedules that make it impossible to maintain a large network of relationships as we used to.  So over the course of our 20’s and 30’s we weed out the less meaningful friendships, or spend less time with them, so they just fade away.  We concentrate on the relationships that are most satisfying, and most meaningful.  After all, time is precious when you’re exhausted from work and raising children.

After realizing that I was on the right developmental trajectory for my age (phew!), I asked myself… What did I take from my FB experience these past couple of weeks?  I now know that I can reach out to my “friends” from past and present.  There are more people out there than I knew I knew.  It is like an online security blanket.  But what if there were a place to chat with those “friends” about topics that are current?  Maybe a blog? …..

What are your thoughts?   

To read the bio for Deborah Heiser, click here.

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